{"id":33030,"date":"2015-11-02T23:49:15","date_gmt":"2015-11-02T14:49:15","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/dev.fragmentsmag.com\/en\/?p=33030"},"modified":"2016-12-17T20:30:18","modified_gmt":"2016-12-17T11:30:18","slug":"behind-loves-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/dev.fragmentsmag.com\/en\/2015\/11\/behind-loves-2\/","title":{"rendered":"What same-sex relationships are actually like? Lesbian couple; Shiki and Miku"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"Shiki:

\u3010LEFT: Shiki\u3011\u3000<\/b>After graduating from Keio University, Shiki worked for an outplacement company, an Educational NPO and an IT company. Shiki has attended counseling since a teenager, because of confusion over her identity.
\u3000\u3010RIGHT: Miku\u3011\u3000<\/b>Miku studied methods for client-centered therapy while working for an infrastructural company and then, a financial company. This year, Miku has been preparing to launch a business for communication and liberating assistance with her partner, Shiki.<\/p><\/div>\n

\u2015\u2015 Please tell us how you met each other.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Miku: <\/i><\/b>We met at a girls\u2019 Christmas party. I often went to those kinds of parties because I felt that I could hang out safely. I went to the party with a friend who was looking for a girlfriend, but it was me that found one (laughs).
\n\u3000But when I first met Shiki, I had no intention to date her. I just thought she would make an interesting friend.<\/p>\n

Shiki: <\/i><\/b>I had been looking for a girlfriend for about half a year as I thought it might change my life in a better way. I was devoting myself to work at the time. I was always feeling empty and under pressure, so I joined the Christmas party to find a girlfriend. I met Miku once or twice after the party. I was attracted by her intelligence, and soon I fell in love with her.<\/p>\n

Miku: <\/i><\/b>After we hung out several times, I had to be hospitalized after an emergency. Shiki was really worried about me and came to see me. Since then, we got to know each other much more than before and we started a relationship. At that time, I wasn\u2019t really desperate to find a partner, but I fell in love with Shiki. Whenever I date someone, I can\u2019t be myself. Love is kind of addictive (laughs).<\/p>\n

Shiki: <\/i><\/b>To tell the truth, before we met, I had been to a fortune-teller. The teller said that I would meet my soul mate at the age of 25. I met Miku at Christmas when I was 25, and she was hospitalized just before I turned 26. Because of this, I thought she was my soul mate and her hospitalization kind of encouraged me to date her.<\/p>\n

\u2015\u2015 What was the reaction of the people around you and society?<\/strong><\/p>\n

Miku: <\/i><\/b>I found out that I was bisexual at university, and I didn\u2019t really try to hide it. So our relationship didn\u2019t cause any problems.<\/p>\n

Shiki: <\/i><\/b>Neither have I found any problems. That is to say, many people thought that we were just friends, but even if we were honest with people, no one would cause any fuss about our relationship. It might be more of a problem when it comes to legal matters that may cause some difficulties, like renting a house.<\/p>\n

\"room-3\" <\/a> <\/div> <\/div>
\"room-4\" <\/a> <\/div>
\"room-2\" <\/a> <\/div> <\/div> <\/div>
\"room-1\" <\/a> <\/div> <\/div> <\/div> <\/div>\n

\u2015\u2015 It\u2019s been four years since you have been in relationship. How have you spent your time together?<\/strong><\/p>\n

Miku: <\/i><\/b>Actually, there have been so many times when I have wondered why I\u2019m with her. Shiki was an extreme workaholic and I always felt ignored.
\n\u3000She was always looking at her PC and her phone, and of course, working on holidays. To me, she never tried to spend time together. For example, when she told me that she would come at 7pm, she wouldn\u2019t arrive until midnight. Even when she did finally come home, she would open her PC immediately and start to work. I felt I was in her way and couldn\u2019t see the point of being together.
\n\u3000Moreover, I didn\u2019t want to see her working. Shiki was torturing herself, and it was as though she was punishing herself by working so hard. To see her like that really hurt me, so I tried to break up with her many times. <\/p>\n

Shiki: <\/i><\/b>For that, I couldn\u2019t accept myself. I worked hard to make someone else recognize me. Miku and work were both important for me, but I couldn\u2019t satisfy them both. I was always making her sad.<\/p>\n

Miku: <\/i><\/b>So I visited a counselor, and she said that I should be independent. The counselor\u2019s words really cleared my mind; I CAN live without Shiki.
\n\u3000This experience really helped me, so I suggested to Shiki that she should go and see the counselor too.<\/p>\n

\"miku-shiki-2\"<\/div>\n

\u2015\u2015 It is very hard to change yourself for someone else, but Shiki, you stepped out. That is something that I admire. After that, has your relationship changed?<\/strong><\/p>\n

Shiki: <\/i><\/b>I was able to quit trying to make others recognize my work. Before that, being promoted at work and paid well, in a good company\u2026 I believed those kinds of things and my professional reputation would make my life precious. But my sense of values changed. I started to find small things very precious and began to feel happy. Even just eating a good meal together was so fulfilling. I can finally accept myself just as I am.<\/p>\n

Miku: <\/i><\/b>Since then, I have become interested in people\u2019s minds. I read many books about this topic and have often discussed it with Shiki.
\n\u3000I used to get angry at Shiki frequently, and I hated myself for getting irritated at someone I love. It is spending so much energy.
\n\u3000But one day, I picked up a book called “How Not To Be Angry”<\/i> at a bookstore. It told me how to control my anger in a simple way, which was really enlightening. I applied what the book said to my daily life, and now I am not as angry!
\n\u3000These things made me interested in the counseling. And it really worked; both Shiki and I were changing.
\n\u3000People tend to think that counseling is only for \u201csick\u201d people, but I believe that everyone could benefit from it. So we are going to launch a liberating business to remove people\u2019s stereotypes; this will be a very comfortable place where anyone can feel at home.<\/p>\n

Shiki: <\/i><\/b>It was pretty natural for me that we decided to launch the business together. We discussed everything and have had honest conversations, so we could combine our ideas easily. We\u2019d like to support each other in business as well.<\/p>\n

\"miku-shiki-3\"<\/div>\n

(End of Interview)<\/p>\n

I had no idea what it would be like to be in a relationship with a person of the same sex, so I didn\u2019t expect the couple to be so laid back. I found that they said nothing that you wouldn\u2019t expect from a heterosexual couple.<\/p>\n

Their episode was just like one that many people have probably experienced. I am aware that I also often find it difficult to balance my career and relationship.<\/p>\n

Overcoming an obstacle together and building a stronger relationship is what any couples have to do. I\u2019m really excited about the establishment of Shiki\u2019s and Miku\u2019s business and hope that it proves to be a successful one.<\/p>\n

(Translation by Akiko Ishige<\/a>)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u2015\u2015 Please tell us how you met each other. Miku: We met at a girls\u2019 Christmas party. I often went to those kinds of parties because I felt that I could hang out safely. I went to the party with a friend who was looking for a girlfriend, but it was me that found one (laughs). \u3000But when I first met Shiki, I had no intention to date her. I just thought she would make an interesting friend. Shiki: I had been looking for a girlfriend for about half a year as I thought it might change my life in a better way. I was devoting myself to work at …<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":23,"featured_media":33035,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[3],"tags":[852,853],"acf":[],"aioseo_notices":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/dev.fragmentsmag.com\/en\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/2\/2015\/11\/miku-shiki-3.jpg","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/dev.fragmentsmag.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/33030"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/dev.fragmentsmag.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/dev.fragmentsmag.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dev.fragmentsmag.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/23"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dev.fragmentsmag.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=33030"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/dev.fragmentsmag.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/33030\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":33032,"href":"https:\/\/dev.fragmentsmag.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/33030\/revisions\/33032"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dev.fragmentsmag.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/33035"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/dev.fragmentsmag.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=33030"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dev.fragmentsmag.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=33030"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dev.fragmentsmag.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=33030"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}